If Only the World Wouldn't get in the Way
by Starjargon
Summary: "You loved her," Peggy said. It wasn't a question. "You were IN love with her." "Yeah. I think I was," sighed Steve. "Tell me about her," Peggy responded. Steve gives Natasha a tribute and Peggy holds him. End Game fix-it.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N-** **Bruce said changing your past doesn't change the future.**

**Written for Happy Steve Bingo 2019. Prompt was Hugs. **

**Canon compliant until end of Endgame.**

* * *

"_See ya in a minute," followed by a smile he had chased for 5 years and now would never see again. _

Steve sat up in bed, breathing hard as he woke from one of the many dreams that haunted him. For the first time since the War, no, probably from before that- from when his ma died, he was at peace. And now his body and mind insisted on reminding him quite frequently of all the battles he'd fought, all the wars he'd help win, all the loved ones he'd los-

Peggy sat up beside him, herself no stranger to nightmares.

"It's all right, darling. You're okay. You're here with me, you're safe, and you did all you could," she whispered, rubbing his back and grounding him in the moment.

"Peg-" was all he could get out, before he let her take his pain, leaning against her as she wrapped her arms firmly around him.

"Which was it?" she asked, her arms never loosening as she pressed kisses into his hair.

"Thanos," he said after a long pause. "Well, Natasha," he closed his eyes and breathed deeply as he said her name, trying to will away the pain as he'd trained himself to do for so long.

Peggy looked down on him in sympathy.

"You loved her," she said. It wasn't a question. "You were_ in_ love with her."

Steve twisted in her arms, resting his head against her chest while he grabbed her left hand with both of his. He kissed the ring he'd placed there in a small ceremony just 1 year ago, before twining their fingers, not allowing her to break her hold on him. He could always be honest with her. Even when it hurt. And he could admit to things he'd never, ever say to another soul. Including himself.

"Yeah. I think I was." His heart started aching again, so he squeezed his wife's arms tighter around himself, needing her stability for his memories.

"Tell me about her," she said, reading his mood and holding the strongest man in the world together with her embrace.

"Natasha… was confident. I trusted her abilities from the second I met her. She was kind- even if she wouldn't admit it. She saw the best in people. She fell in love with a man when all he saw in himself was a monster. She had such a dark past but spent her whole life trying to reshape herself, be better than what everyone had made her," he had to pause, turning to breathe in Peggy's scent, to push through the pain trying to engulf him. "She did whatever needed to be done, always. I think she was even more determined to do what she thought was the right thing- to fight for the _right _side- than I ever was." He chuckled, and Peggy smiled, filled with disbelief but she tried to humour him all the same.

"So many people only saw what she wanted them to see. She only let a few see the real her. She was funny. Tony- he always made jokes to deflect from a situation. I think Nat really could find the humour or irony in anything. She was… strong. She kept the team together when we all fell apart. Chased Clint to the ends of the earth, just to let him know he wasn't alone. The only thing she ever questioned about herself was whether she was trustworthy. And she was. She always was, even when no one but Clint saw it. She wasn't enhanced, wasn't a soldier, but she was always willing to fight and stand, even if it meant fighting against her friends and even when it meant standing alone."

"Hmm. Doesn't remind me of anyone at all," Peggy quipped with a small smirk. Steve nuzzled into her neck for that.

"Did I tell you, she kept trying to set me up on dates?" he asked, peeking through her arms to look up at his Peg's face. She smiled and shook her head. He leaned up and kissed her gently. When he pulled back, he continued, "She never wanted me to be alone, or to lose myself. She didn't understand my best girl is irreplaceable." She squeezed him tighter for that, and he her.

"But she could have- you could have started over with her?" Peggy prompted, not jealous, but curious.

Steve thought about it.

"I think I could have. Almost did, but we just kept missing out moment. First, I was missing you, then she started falling for Bruce, and then… it was the end of the world and it didn't seem right, moving on like that. In that way."

"Hmm. So she never got to have this?" She hugged her husband tighter to herself to make her point. "She never got her own version of a happy ending?"

Steve turned so he could hold onto his wife in the way he once thought would be impossible, wrapping his arms around her as securely as she was still wrapped around him. He rubbed his cheek against her soft hair, breathing in her shampoo and feeling each part of his body relax even as his heart broke softly for his friend.

"She spent her entire life at the command of others. She was a good spy, a great partner, a flawless teammate and an unshakable friend. But she wasn't really _free _until Thanos destroyed our world. And even then, I think she took on the weight of the world to try to relieve us of it. Clint- he said there was only one way to get the Soul Stone, and Natasha did it. She… she finally got to make a choice that was all hers, 100%. And I know that. I know she got to wipe out the red she thought was in her ledger, I just-"

"You still wish they could have brought her back," Peggy finished for him, her head against his chest.

"You would have liked her. She was so smart and witty. Competent. Beautiful. Facetious. Never let me get away with anything, not that I tried too hard around her. Clint told me once that she saw a television programme about people working in an office, right when she started working for SHIELD, and decided that being on missions counted as her office space, so she would create the same dynamic at work as she had seen on television."

"Thus trying to send you on dates."

"Yeah." He smiled sadly, remembering his fallen partner, with all the pain and joy that came with it.

"Peg- she was my best friend for a long time. In a different way from Sam or even Bucky- I, I had her when I had nothing else. We had each other. And then we didn't. I- she wouldn't want me to dwell any more than you would, but-"

"It's okay to miss her, Steve. She made her choice, and you need to respect the fact that she was able to, since it sounds like that was a luxury she didn't always have. But you _have _started again- over and over and over. And I'm proud of you." She squeezed the arms around his middle to make her point, then looked up and kissed him once more. "And I'm glad you had her in your life."

He looked down at her, removing one arm from around her waist to gently caress her beautiful face.

"I love you," he said, looking at her with a mixture of grief and relief and adoration and spoke with such sincerity that Peggy had to kiss him again, then pulled his head back down to her chest so she could kiss his forehead.

"I know," she replied with full conviction, carding her fingers through his hair and holding him together until he fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

"Steve!" Peggy called out, a few weeks later. "We have new neighbors. Mrs. Leibowitz said someone bought the house three doors down. I'll invite them over once they've settled."

"Okay, Peg," Steve said, going to the window to see if he could see anything suspicious.

* * *

Three days later, a knock sounded on his door. He went to open it, then dropped the spoon Peggy had given him to stir the soup with.

"Hey, Neighbor," Peggy heard when she went to see what had caused the commotion. There, standing before her gobsmacked husband, was a beautiful petite redhead.

"Steve?" Peggy asked, going to the door and opening it wider.

"Nat?" Steve croaked. He finally moved forward and enveloped her in a secure hug.

She quirked her lips when he pulled away, looking him up and down before introducing herself to Peggy with a wide smile, then turning back to Steve. "Finally got a life, huh? She must be very brave, Steve, if she let you near a stove."

"Well, love is blind and apparently can't taste." He responded, still shocked over the sight of his long-dead friend. "Natasha, how-"

"Apparently, it worked. Whatever you guys did. Only, for me and Gamora, we were sent to where the Guardian of the Soul Stone came from, hours apart from each other. He was an old friend of yours. The Red Skull mean something to you, Steve?"

"Definitely not a friend. Gamora?" Steve looked up to see a green woman wearing a long coat and hair styled to hide her face. Then understanding came into his eyes. "Thanos' daughter. Bruce tried to get you back, Nat- he snapped first, which must have worked for her. Tony must have brought you back before he..."

"Oh," Natasha said, a sad look on her face. "Well…I guess we both did whatever it took." Steve looked troubled by that, until his wife interrupted.

"Would you like to come inside?" Peggy asked both women, realising there were better places for this conversation than in the doorway. "Perhaps catch up? If you came in the time of the Red Skull, you've been here for a few years. You must have been quite busy to be here now."

Natasha smirked. They had indeed.

"Nice ring," Steve remarked, indicating her left hand.

"Yours too," she replied with a soft smile. Steve put his arms around Peggy, giving her a quick peck on the lips and a smile. They turned to lead the way inside.

"Oh, Steve," Natasha said, reaching out to catch her friend's arm. "I found something you dropped."

Steve looked at her in confusion, then his eyes grew wide and his jaw dropped as he saw the man coming up behind her, the bold glint of a ring matching Natasha's on a very familiar metal hand.

"Hey there, Punk."

* * *

**A/N- Yes, I went there, but I believe Natasha would as well as long as it could be followed up in this way. This story is one of many tributes she deserves. Written post-Endgame.**


End file.
